Friends- who are they really?

No one is every too busy are they? Lives get in the way but we are never too busy to spend a minute or two with a friend. Unless of course we aren’t really friends at all. I’ve often thought about the meaning of the word friend. According to the Oxford Dictionary it means ‘a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relation. ‘

Hmmmm…. Not what we all think of when we say friend. At least the later part of the term. Then again there are Friends with Benefits (there was a whole movie surrounding the concept). Still we use the term ‘friend’ so casually. Some even go as far as to use the term ‘Best Friend’ or ‘Bestie’ very casually. So according to the dictionary definition what exactly is this type of friend? Can it be defined? I know, maybe this is off in left field somewhere. Maybe even over the fence, but it is used rather freely. So it leads me to ask the question, when you have a friend who says they’ll keep in touch and call but doesn’t, what kind of a friend is that? A flake.

There are then those who say they are friends and then talk about you behind your back as if you will never find out. You smile and pretend everything is fine but know that they are really just ‘Frenemies’. You never trust these people. I wouldn’t even trust letting them borrow a pen. They might say you gave it to them and then when you wanted it back you stole it from them.

Please don’t take this the wrong way. I have some wonderful people in my life whom I call friends that are truly great people. In fact one came over today and brought me lunch while we talked about all the fun stuff in our lives (thank you so much!). Another friend, walks with me each week, texts, talks on the phone and shoots the breeze around the fire pit; and another well… We can go to the movies, go shopping, have drinks, be critical or just listen because we know each other that well.

I guess what I’m saying is if someone means something to you, you’ll find time in your busy day to include them. Even if it is a simple ‘what’s up?’ Or ‘how’s it going old sport?’

…and make sure you steer clear of the Frenemies. You’ll know one when you see one.

‘The smallest things in life sometimes have the biggest impact on our lives.’
~R.T.

Advertisements

Road to recovery, part 1

When they say you can’t. Then you have to.’ ~ Nike

It has been a day of blue bonnets, hospital gowns, and IV’s. Fortunately the surgery went well and I am on my way to recovering. Having had two prior knee surgeries this one felt like a piece of cake. The pain one never really gets accustomed to.

As for getting back up and out there on the road… It will take time, much like anything in life. Hard work and determination will get me there. I’ve learned over time that you can’t let anyone tell you that you ‘can’t’ do it. You always can- if you believe in yourself. You have to have drive and be persistent. Stubborn even. I intend to be up and mobile in a couple days, walking without crutches and walking at least around the block by the end of the week. Ambitious? Stubborn? Crazy? No, just determined. I’m not letting an injury sideline me. Just like I won’t let life’s setback sideline me.

If you want something bad enough, go out and get it. It is your life. Live it.

My run is in 160 days. I’ll be ready because I have to be. I’m determined.

An obstacle in life…

” Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” -Michael Jordan

This has been my struggle for the last couple months. My husband and I had been training for a half-marathon. Seems like a big tasking. We normally try and keep fit by going to the gym, the tennis courts, use the treadmills, or run outside here and there. Not 13.1 miles however. This was our goal for the year, our New Years Resolution. Then I blew knee out on one of our big run days. It wasn’t a first time injury either. I have two screws already and have had two previous knee surgeries, so when it happened I figured it was just some scar tissue moving around. Keep going, keep pushing yourself along. I tried. I really did. I walked and forced myself to run-a little. Unfortunately, it was more than I had originally thought. I’d in fact blown it out.

So here I am with an obstacle before me, a blown knee. This happened in late February. It is now May. The swelling has gone down and I do walk 6-8 miles with my neighbor regularly. I run on the treadmill, and still go out to ‘attempt’ tennis; the problem is I hit that wall. I’m at a limit and can’t push further without another surgery. The surgery will put me out for close to 4 weeks, if I let it. Fortunately, it isn’t a reconstruction or at least we think it isn’t at this point. Just a “scope and scrape”.

The good news out of all this is we signed up for our half-marathon. It is still our goal. I will have 5 months to recover and even if it means I will walk and run or even crawl over the finish line, I will finish our goal. By still pushing for our goal and registering we are climbing that wall, working around the blown knee and going through the recovery-together.

Tomorrow is my surgery and it will be a grueling few days to get through before I will be able to walk without assistance, but it won’t hold me down long. I will be up, moving, walking and running in no time.

Whatever obstacle you have , make sure you don’t let it get in your way. Keep a positive outlook ahead of you and inner strength within you. You can do whatever you put your mind too.

See you on the flip side of surgery.

Today it’s all about the birds

Today is one of those days. It isn’t overly warm outside, it is overcast and yet the birds are as happy as can be. I’ve often wondered what is it that they chirp about all day long. Do they have a specific language (I am sure there is some biological reason) like we do that makes them able to interact all day? If there is, then my backyard is the call center for the entire valley of the bird species in this area. From the time the sun begins to show color in the East to the time the sun has gone down the birds are constantly communicating in the trees in my yard.

Don’t get me wrong. I am definitely not complaining. It is a far better melody to listen to than a dog whining for its owner at 1 in the morning to let them back into the house, only for the dog to find after 20 minutes of soulful howling that the owner has fled for the weekend leaving it behind. Or a mother scream at their young child once again because they aren’t paying attention to what the child is doing (this is a whole other topic in itself). I’d rather hear the birds conversing with one another. It just amazes me that they can carry on such strings of communication for periods of time and humans- well, we seem to have issues stringing words together to even have a conversation.

I guess it is just nice to sit back in a chair, close my eyes and listen to their chirping, their banter and hear in the faint distance a train whistle.

Maybe it’s me and maybe it’s just something about spring weather.

Freedom is not free

Today is not a day for sales and shopping. Although I am sure a lot of people are out enjoying the many bargains they found in the Sunday paper. It isn’t even about lighting up the barbecue and having a block party with the neighborhood in celebration of a 3-day weekend. No, today is about honoring those who have served our country to protect our freedoms.

It is about those who served, and are serving. Across America there are people visiting cemeteries, placing flags and flowers in honor of those who have fallen. There are ceremonies taking place and moments of silence being given. There is respect being shown for those who fought for what they believed in- our country and our flag.

This morning when I took a walk with my neighbor, it was disheartening to see how few American flags were being flown outside of homes. In our four miles we counted maybe 12 total flags. Have we lost touch with what it means to be the United States of America? Are we too centered on the 3-day weekend and ourselves that we don’t remember what this country was founded on? I know that we are a diverse nation that has many different nationalities under one umbrella. We always have been. But what happened? Somewhere along the way people seem to have forgotten what the Red,White, and Blue stands for.

It isn’t just the Fourth of July that the colors are to come out and people identify themselves with America. It isn’t the baseball, hot dog, apple pie, and Chevrolet either. It comes from deep down. So the next time you see a soldier in uniform go up and simply say ” Thank you for your service.” Their face will show the humble contribution that they provide each and everyday to you and to their country. That is what today is about. Service before self. Honor, integrity, respect.

Happy Memorial Day

20130527-181416.jpg

The use of “Excuse Me”

“Excuse me.”

What happened to these two little words? I feel like they have disappeared from our language. There are still some people that use them, however, most don’t even say them at all. People just push past you, stand in front of you, or wait angrily behind you and then say something rude and inappropriate as they pass.

I say this because in the store yesterday a man, in his 60s was standing waiting for his wife. I asked if he was waiting for one of the lines. He shook his head ‘No’ so I stepped up to the line. Then this man, stepped into the line next to me and pushed me in the back. Yes, pushed me so he could get past to the checkout station. Now, I’m sorry but-really??? I was polite to you, I was courteous and there was no reason for the pushiness. What makes people think that they are above all others to be so rude and discourteous? I didn’t say anything, but I am appalled at how the use of two little words has diminished from our society. Is everyone in such a rush that they can’t take a little time to say these words out loud? Are people that disrespectful of others that values have become lost?

If there was a little more respect for one another maybe more people would have a smile on their face, or be thankful, or even have a better all around day. Be patient and courteous. I know- I’m asking a lot. I’m not June Cleaver and saying we need to live in Leave it to Beaverland, but we should show each other respect.

Ok, I will step off of my soapbox now. “Excuse me for my ranting.”

Enjoy your day!

Is communication dead?

Communication.

Seems simple enough. It usually takes place face-to-face, over the phone, through correspondence, via text, etc… So why is it so difficult for people to communicate?

We are perfect by no means. No one is, but simply put people don’t understand the importance of communication anymore. The technological world has diminished the need for people to embrace what communication means. Of course you can fire off an e-mail and the other person will receive it, but will they read it? You can send a text and wait anxiously for a reply and you may never get one. Communication has become a one way road on what use to be a two lane highway. Can we do anything about this? Maybe we can and maybe we can’t…

I know that today, I am going to sit down and write a hand-written letter to a friend. Yes, old school way of doing things. Sometimes the surprise in the mail is the best type of communication starter there is.