We can overcome just about anything that is put before us. The one thing that I have learned is that we need time to heal our wounds and help us resolve the problems that we have in front of us.
I say this as I have been battling a situation where I am being bullied. The individuals are condescending, belittling, relentless in their actions and no matter how much I fight back to hold my tongue and interact as appropriately as possible I am not given a fair shake or the time to resolve items. I am consistently pushed.
I am trying my best to overcome the situation but it is pushing me over the edge, making me numb and less interested in what I need to do. I am beginning to withdrawal.
I am looking to a higher power to overcome this feeling and help me through before I break completely as I feel those I’ve told aren’t helping the situation any at all.
I sit on conference calls a lot and when I speak up at times I don’t know if people are listening or grasping for things to do while I talk. Have I been heard?
In another situation silence makes you wonder if what you have said means you’ve been heard.
I often try to talk to my adult college age child about important matters (i.e. Scholarship deadlines, money, life plans, choices) and wonder- have I been heard.
There are times when I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs just to see if anyone will react because I am invisible to them and unheard.
What does it take to be heard nowadays? Does it take people to fight in the streets, post ridiculous media segments, protest for a cause that is only one sided or be part of something you know is not within your moral ground. Is that what it takes to be heard? If it is- I’d rather be silent.
Training. You train and train and then you run. Do you do as well as you want- you hope too but one can’t predict how conditions will be, body will feel, or how mentally prepared you really are.
I bring these things up because recently my husband and I did 19.3 miles over two days. It was part of a RunDisney even in FL but the training and drive we put ourselves through to get there was more than we’d done for any 1/2 marathon we’d done previously. Already having a bad knee it was even more painful and grueling for me as I had to engage in wearing my knee brace once again- something I haven’t had to do for about three years now.
Everything started well, which was good because the 10k was a good race. I improved my time since my last 10k by two minutes and I get good after. A bit of swelling but we were still able to walk around at least one park in the afternoon. The next day for the half, I was a little more reluctant. My time was 12 minutes over my best 1/2 and I know that at least some of that time is chalked up to standing in line for the women’s restroom or a port-a-let because they did not have enough open on the course but I was dragging by mile eight. A ring on my right hand also was beginning to feel very tight and I had to take it off and string it through my necklace. Thank goodness that I didn’t lose it on the course! My knee, well- it felt like it was about the size of a grapefruit and that the screws were screaming to come out. I kept plugging along though to finish.
Why am I saying all this?
I trained. I had blisters, sweat, tears, and a swollen knee- I trained and I wasn’t going to let anything stop me from finishing. In fact the only thing that would was going to be balloon ladies if I ever saw them come up behind me. So if you are determined enough to continue moving forward toward your goal you can do anything.
In fact, on Thanksgiving, we ran another 10k to help feed the hungry. My knee has still been bothering me and I haven’t been out there running a whole lot- but it was my best 10k yet! I shaved 3 minutes off my time I ran earlier in the month and didn’t even try. What it boils down too is that all my training and hard work paid off and I wasn’t even stressed about it. I didn’t focus on conditions, how I really felt, or how mentally prepared I was. I just went out and did my best.
Sometimes in life that is what we all need to do. Do our best and be the best possible person we all can be.
When I was a little girl I loved watching the super heroes. The battled the bad guys, they fought crime, they restored goodness to all. I wanted to be a super hero to do everything that they did.
So as I grew I thought that I would be a Nurse. They were super heroes. They fought disease, helped people live, and restored people to their former state of health when possible. Then I had surgery on my knee and saw all the blood, the drainage bag, and all the horrible stuff that came with it and couldn’t bring my self to do those things- it wasn’t the right fit for me.
Years passed and when I got married I found a box with some old things in it. One of them was my super hero mirror of Wonder Woman. Oh I loved that mirror . I remembered how I wanted to be her and do the things she did. I could spin around and change in seconds to my flashy outfit and be someone who fought the bad guys and saved the day. I was tall too so it made being Wonder Woman even more important and spot on. Oh how I loved those days.
Through the years I’ve kept the mirror. Always thinking about how Wonder Woman would get through or do something, having a child and doing everything a mom does makes one a Wonder Woman in itself, but to truly have the power of the lasso and to be her would be awesome.
To me, I am a Wonder Woman. I may not have the golden lasso, the flashy outfit, or the fabulous boots, but I have my super fantastic family, my fierce mind, and my willingness to never give up.
Every now and then we go back in time, does anyone know what I mean? A smell, a song, a familiar sight it doesn’t matter what it is but we are taken back. Several things take me back to my childhood and don’t get me wrong it wasn’t all sunshine and roses but I do remember the happy moments most- I think we all do in some way.
My best moments to remember are playing at the beach near the lake, taking walks in the woods near the river or lake with my boyfriend, or playing in the front yard. As a child I loved to make forts out of blankets and believing I were in some other country. I am not a camper so this was the closest thing I ever got to really camping and it was perfectly fine with me. Other moments were playing with my Adventure People. Loved them. So many adventures and careers I pretended to be: EMT, Nurse, Rock Climber, Marine Life Rescue Worker, the list can go on- I had a great imagination. I also can’t leave out playing with Evil Kanevil and Dary Daring. I guess growing up in the mountains with your friends spread out throughout the Lake Tahoe basin it was hard to always get to their houses and one needed to be creative and learn to use their imagination.
If you were to ask a GenX or GenY what they did, the answer would be different. I’m glad I was able to have fun, experience the outside and live. Your mind is an endless creative way to socialize even if it is with toys and the memories you create are lasting.